chicagodads

What was astounding about Thanksgiving was how obvious the pro-turkey bias is. Big turkey has got its grabby claws on everybody. Even dear ol’ grams, when referring to our potted pig just out of the oven, mentioned what a good-looking bird that must be. To be fair, though, she could only see it from a distance and my wife absentmindedly agreed with her.

To say that I was making ham on Thanksgiving Day and not turkey was tantamount to admitting that Benedict Arnold was a true American patriot and that nobody should knock the idea of eating human flesh for the Holidays until they’ve at least tried it. You would have thought that I slapped George Washington’s mother in the face.

But the truth is twofold. First, I eat turkey all the time. It is our number one substitute for meat. You want a hamburger without the guilt but you want to know that it had some form of (non-turnip-related) blood? Try a turkey-burger. That’s what we do. All. The. Time. Pasta meat, homemade pizza sausage… well, that’s about it, I suppose. But if there more items that I would make on a regular basis, you could bet that turkey would be on the meat-substitute. Either that or peanut-butter.

TBC tomorrow.

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