chicagodads

 And I would just like to suggest that I’m a very spiritual person and that the reason I haven’t blogged is because I’ve been fasting from such concerns this week. But really, I just got tired of it for a moment. And I’ve actually been busy when I haven’t been supertired.

But I thought I’d at least drop by and share a link. In light of all of the recent talk of designer parenting, I found this illuminating news analysis/interview rather… enlightening.

Status: Tonight being Maundy Thursday, I plan on eating a hefty meal — as if it were my last supper. And then probably be betrayed by one of my twelve twitter followers and handed over to the Romans. Busy night.

Say it isn’t so…

A new skate park to be opened shortly near our house was noted for vandalism by some concerned local citizens.

With no disrespect, tagging happens. At least it’s not a gang issue. Nor is it private or even business property being hit up by graffitti artists.

Here’s some history of graffitti art in Chicago.

“Just Don’t ” by garryknight via Flickr

On my other site, Left Cheek, I bi-weekly compiled a Links We Like to Link to list - somewhat as a way to clear my windows cache as a way to clear my head. Felt it was long overdue for a massive one, but since most of these were specifically Chicago and/or Dad-driven, thought this might be the most appreciative spot for this list. It’s long, so I’ll keep the verbage short.

Daley’s gift-horse isn’t to be looked at in the gift-mouth. Or, logged.

CPS coaches are put on a tight leash. (Paddling? Seriously? I knew some of these cats were OC, but I never really thought it was systemic. Maybe they should consider paying coaches like they do in the ‘burbs, though.)

ED Hirsch on validity of multiple-choice testing, but at a concentrating on so-called grade-level skills. I still don’t buy it. Too much time and effort wasted teaching kids how to fill in some bubbles. Try telling a youth how this will lead them to a well-adjusted life as an adult, and all you can say is, “Well, you won’t have to do this again.”

And the lone Republican candidate in the 5th Congressional District (the one formerly staffed by Blago, Rostenkowski, and Rahm Emanuel.), I think she takes the spewing cake of hate, revile, and disgust all for herself.

$250 million state insurance to guarantee against Chicago 2016 Olympics . Can you hear the Charlie Brown moan leave my gutterals? Arrghh!!

And finally, in the spirit of the blarney stone, kudos to this south side neighborhood for closing the St. Paddy’s Parade (mostly because of knuckleheads like this guy ) and downsizing festivities to put focus back on families, heritage and children .

I read this comment from a neighborhood . listserv this morning and it really got my head spinning:

Like the male (adult) black who lives at [omitted] and tells the 8 year old kid, “Shut the [omitted] up, mother [omitted]”

Now, of course, part of the reason my head is spinning is because the guy used it as an excuse to take a cheap shot at affordable housing and anyone connected with affordable housing (ie, low-income families and those who would fight for them - which the poster after him took to even further extremes). Another reson my head was (is) spinning is because I’m coming down with something. But, it did cause me to pause and ask, “When is it okay for neighbors to directly interfere with a parent-child relationship?” (Assuming that the child is his in one aspect or another.)

And no one can tell me that that type of language isn’t abuse (although people have told me that, I know better because I’ve seen the psychological ramifications years down the line). Yet I know that there is no way I would be able to just come by and tell this punk to not treat his girl in that manner. Not without knowing him. But even still, somebody should say and do something, right? Are our communities so broken down that we do not have a say in each other’s lives, that we cannot speak out for the protection of children? Or is this just a line of busy-bodiness (which it was with the writer of the post)? After all, aren’t there worse things to worry about than words said to a kid?

Such as this story where a (to quote the title from the blog “What About Our Daughters”), “1 Year-Old Liliana Goodman Beaten to Death by Mama’s “Boyfriend” for Being “Disrespectful” While Others Watch.” She was beaten for four hours! And there were others in the house! It wasn’t until late on in the beating that the mother stepped in.

Later I want to ask when is it right or necessary for the state to step in and do a parent’s job (or deem a parent’s job?). But for now, I do want to ask, when do neighbors step in? Upon threat of violence? When a parent spanks a child? When a parent smacks a child (even behind closed doors)? When there are whispers of violence? What are the guidelines, the boundaries, and whose boundaries do we abide by? (For instance, I have a lot of friends who lightly spank. As do we on ocassion - though I hate to admit it; I’d rather we didn’t. But then others say that a tap or a spank is always wrong.)

What do you think?

Chicago has been gearing up to host the Olympics for a bit now. Early next month, we are expected to be on our best behavior as the International Olympic Committee is staking out our city to see how prepared we are to smoothly take in all of these visitors and games.

So it begins.

Somehow, we’re expected to believe that the Olympics will bring in tons of revenue but not cost us anything in the long or short-run. The new Olympic Village being built out of the ashes of Reese Hospital will eventually be bought out by developers and sold as condos and taxpayers will get all of their credited money back (Of course, that was a ridiculous idea even before the housing bust, which has changed the way we plan for and pay for housing for the indefinite future).

And now monies are being diverted (as one would expect) to pay for repaving the area around Jefferson Park (the primary location of the projected games) while schools and hospitals are shutting down , there’s a long-standing (or, rather, not-standing) sinkhole (a bit unrelated, because it’s in Des Plaines, but sink holes are dangerous for our finest and our infrastructure) and the list goes on and on.

Yeah, it’s a big sinkhole. Here’s to hoping we never get the go-ahead from the IOC.

That’s how I recalled standing in for an in-school suspension room when I substitute taught at a school on the North Side of Chicago. A school not far from where my wife lived for a few years before she left the country. A school near where a teenager was fatally shot the other day - the 26th Chicago Public School student shot in this school year.

That’s as many students as were shot all of last school year, when citywide violence against young people was all the newspapers could talk about. The Chicago Sun-Times reports, “At this time in 2008, 19 students had been killed. In 2007, 18 were dead by March 11… The Sun-Times reported this week that 508 students had been shot from Sept. 2007 through Dec. 2008.”

This right after a student in a West Side school stabs his bully with a pair of scissors during a conflict resolution meeting.

I must admit I was wrong. The school didn’t measure up to what I’d seen as being a “bad” school. The neighborhood, compared to Humboldt Park or much of Logan Square, didn’t seem to be in dire need of a social overhaul or a bunch of Hugs for Troubled Thugs-type programs. But everybody hurts, and violence can happen anywhere: small towns in Alabama or a high school in Germany.

This is a systemic problem. It needs systemic solutions. Not just a hero, tons of them. Neighborhoods full of fathers and mothers and churches and mosques and synagogues and non-profits and teachers and administrators and counselors and cafeteria workers and accountants and line cooks and law clerks and construction workers and carpenters and butchers and candlestick makers and community activists and police all joining up to be good neighbors. We all need to be heroes. We owe it to this next generation to not abandon them in their hour of need.

As I mentioned earlier, I am in the middle of writing four different long-form works. Two of which are memoir-ish essays (one of which I’ve done some preparatory work on this blog), one of which is a children’s book, and the last is a young adult’s novel.

The young adult’s novel I’ve only gotten about two short chapters in right now, but don’t worry. I found the perfect tool to help me breeze my way through the rest of it. It’s the So You’ve Decided to Be Evil generator. I figure with my book’s antagonist out of my way, I’ll have more time to grapple with my own personal antagonist, The Attention-Grubbing Paper-Destroying Toddler.

I was raised in the city. I wish I could say that I always felt home here, but that isn’t true. I wanted to live in the ‘burbs during my teen years. I wish I could say that it was always easy living in the city, but that wouldn’t be true either. I also wish that I could tell you and certainly my daughter that I have always felt safe here, but I’d be lying through my locks.

My brothers and I grew up and habituated in some dangerous neighborhoods (understood of in terms of plenty of poverty, gangs, drug-dealing, homelessness, etc.), but I’ve been fortunate enough to not really have to face much personal violence. Been the victim of a string of burglaries during my teens, never really had to deal with gangs (perhaps it was the whole geekery and/or the church-boy thingy, but they just left me alone), got mugged once (considering the places I’ve been and the hours I’ve been down them, it seems to me that the odds are better getting struck by lightning), a couple attempted and bungled pick-pockets (though I did become the victim of poaching once, it wasn’t in Chicago).

All to say, I turned out all right. But, I understand that not everybody feels as nonchalant about being near such circumstances, especially when it’s your kids on the line.

But I also know a little about the— shall we call it, seedy underbelly of growing up in gated communities. The drugs might be sold, for example, in the inner city, but that isn’t necessarily their end destination. Then there’s the suicide rate, and this general (but perhaps unquantifiable) feeling of angst, meaninglessness, and boredom that young ones feel - which is why so many of them move to the Big City at first chance, only to return to the ‘burbs (or extend the suburbs into exurbia) once they have children.

Which finally brings us to our point (I so don’t like to beat around the bush…): one of the primary decisions on where a child attends school literally centers on the location of the household. Many of those who can afford to relocate so that their children can attend the best schools do so. Even those that I know that could not afford to pack up and move packed up and sent their child to a relative who lived in a preferable district or neighborhood.

“Let’s Go To Work Boys” by Senor Codo via Flickr.

The reasons for moving are myriad: the cost of raising a family in the city is prohibitive for some (as I imagine it would be in New York, or if one was looking to own in Chicago, especially in a nicer neighborhood); others have carefully gauged all factors (I know a father that got out a very intricate spreadsheet and mathematically mapped it all out); some are worried about their children not fitting in a particular location (where there are few others like them, or too many like them); perceived or real notions of superiority of education based on empirical, intangible or imagined factors (I have some friends that I love dearly leave the city under the notion that any public school in any suburban zone is preferable to any public school in Chicago. I tried to convince them of the foolishness of that decision, and that was before I became a teacher/advocate. I am even more convinced now that they were wrong); cultural issues (for us, this is a paramount reason to stay in the city. We want our daughter to be able to understand that the world is filled with people who do not necessarily look or act like us, and that that is both a good thing to know and a good tool to have); and, finally, to be honest, safety issues.

But I’d like to know what you think: Have you chosen a route, did you regret it, will you choose, have you given it much thought, etc, etc.?

Did anybody else catch Hugh Jackman talking to Bahbawa Waltehz before the show about adoption (specifically, he and his wife adopted two mixed-race children, he says, because they were told few possible adopters wanted them. I wasn’t able to catch everything he said thereabouts, and I can’t find clips of that part. Anybody else catch it)? It warmed my heart to hear him (and, yes, other big-name celebrities) talk so openly about adopting. This, I believe, is a big step up from my parents’ generation, when adopting was looked down upon as being less-than “real” parenting, at least in mainstream society. It seems that the stigma is still there (I really can’t imagine why else fertility drugs and in vitro, etc., are so popular), so I applaud the Angelina Jolie’s, et.al., for taking a public stand for adoption when so many children are (to be quite frank if not PC) in need of parents.

What do you think of celebrities and this new fashion (so to say) of adoption? Is it mostly just another guilty-trip cause, an accessory, a noble idea that should catch on?

So, apparently, I may have spoken too soon. It seems that Rolan Burris did talk to Blagojevich (or, in this case, his proxy, also named Blagojevich, Rob Blagojevich. Try saying that Happy-Potted-Hippopotamus line eight times fast.) about financial aid before accepting the Senate appointment . Talks of Burris doing fund-raising for the then-governor broke down because of gathering heat, apparently. And now the Illinois legislature seems to actually be in a silent tizzy about this all.

And I could see why they’d want to keep their mouths shut. It is embarrassing to the entire state and it could lead to further investigations, as long as the spotlight’s on Illinois (and not just Chicago this time). Let’s hope that this cheap sweater gets unraveled.

From where I sit, our country is divided over a lot of different issues. Pro- v. Anti-. You name the controversial subject, we’ve got some kind of war going on, whether it be abortion, living wages, extension of government, illegal immigration, the death penalty, health insurance, gay rights. As Wilco put it succinctly a few years ago, we’ve even got a “War on War”.

But one of the more scary ones for me is tied up with this notion that we should not allow our children to become vaccinated (or at least with certain vaccines) because it doesn’t really lessen the chances of them catching the disease and yet raises the risk of leading to autism. The alternative in this no-win situation is that a mass group of children will not take necessary vaccines and all of a sudden we have the Second Coming of Polio coming down on us like the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

So, in a sense I am glad that a US special cases court has ruled against the vaccines-as-cause-to-autism group . Not that I know that they are right (I have a weird trust/mistrust issue with anything from authorities - specifically when those authorities exchange a lot of money), but this is a public health issue as well as a private health issue, and I’d rather that people not use my child as a guinea pig for their pet farms.

So, in other words, though I’m not sure about this issue, I can feel safe(r) picking a side. And maybe I can debate why that’s wrong or right another time, but Valentines is going to be a long day, and it’s already started.

Now your curiosity can be at least partly sated.

Among the revelations are:

• Bert and Ernie were not named after minor characters in It’s a Wonderful Life. (Seriously, I was sure they were. Maybe subconsciously though.)
• Rizzo the Rat, however, was named after Dustin Hoffman’s character in Midnight Cowboy (Ratso Rizzo). (Haven’t seen it as of yet.)
• Miss Piggy’s backstory is too sad to tell on this site. At least in my opinion. But I’ll say this much, it involves her being a beauty queen. 
• Animal = Keith Moon? Possibly, but not certainly. An-nee-mal! An-nee-mal! An-nee-mal!

The stories surrounding that last one, though… I don’t know if the Muppets would be such a good influence on my baby…

The Family Guy’s Stewie nails and hangs me right here. Well, I’m technically not working on any novel, but I’ve got four small pieces floating around (essay/memoirs, one children’s book and one young adult novella [maybe]), plus some ocassional poetry. And sometimes, there’s that internal voice in my head going around. I don’t know how many other stay-at-home fathers are feeling like this, but I sure am:

Click [edit] here if because file doesn’t play.

Edit: It didn’t take too long to find it on Youtube (although the quality is pretty crappy):

Again, if file doesn’t play, click here .

If it still doesn’t play, it’s because you’re trying to watch it at work and somebody’s watching you…

Comic books have historically been dark. Batman operated within line of the pulp novels and for a few issues in the earliest episodes of the late 1930’s even carried a gun. And the moral code that he and Superman are known by now (never taking a life and doing everything in their power to save all lives, even those of the most dangerous villains), well, he didn’t have it for a little bit longer and acted accordingly.

It was in the post-WWII era that the Comics Code came out and they “cleaned up” their acts. The comics became purely a pre-adolescent medium, strictly for the kids. Stan Lee & Jack Kirby’s inventions at Marvel grew up the kids a bit and talked about more grown up issues (Spider-Man’s coming-of-age fables, the X-Men as outsiders and racial [and then sexual] identity , nuclear-age worries and rage with The Hulk).

And maybe that’s where I see the golden age. Because I’m just not into the thrills of ultra-violence and uber-navel gazing that so many of the “more important” comic series have taken since the nineties - especially with the advent of Frank Miller (”Sin City”, “The Dark Knight Returns”, “300″) and Alan Moore (”Swamp Thing”, “V is for Vendetta”, and most relevantly for this discussion, “Watchmen”).

I know that much of it is art, it is good, it is worth musing over and pontificating. I’m not lecturing. I mean, I’ve read much of these (I’m in the process of reading through “Watchmen” and the trying-to-outdo-each-other series “52″). It’s just that, if you didn’t know, the comics aren’t necessarily for the kids anymore. And, for what it’s worth, that’s kind of sad for me because comics are how I learned to read. Seriously.

Also, I definitely won’t be taking my daughter (or wife) to see the Watchmen movie.

And not so sure that I wanna go myself.

Edit:

Just in case you were still wondering if I’m a nerd, I love everything this guy puts out:

Rod went out with a whimper, from what I heard. It was a loud, blustery, meandering whimper, from what I heard. But he went out, and in the end, that’s what matters. Or is it?

1. Legendary Chicago Sun-Times columnist Mary Mitchell came on the Rachel Maddow show on Friday to speak briefly of the impeachment and offered something revealing before almost (and oddly) redacting her statement. She compared state lawmakers to a group of thugs hanging out in the corner, trying to do their game. They don’t face any real trouble until one of their kind brings in “the heat”. When that happens, they have to shut down that person in order to reduce the heat.
2. The new guy, Pat Quinn, once was referred to as “Celozzi & Ettleson all rolled into one.” That’s cool, because I could always save more money. He also, at least used to, have a very different take on education funding than anybody else near his office from what I’ve heard. But I doubt that the legislature will get behind some whack-a-mamy scheme to double the Illinois state tax (to 6%, I believe) for the wealthiest in an effort to reduce the need for suckling on the teats of property taxes according to region (which means the poorer regions always lose out). I mean, not when there’s at least one other state that has a better record than Illinois at funding our schools.
3. An interesting and possibly apocryphal story about former Illinois Governor Otto Kerner, the first of the (il)legal dynasty ending with Ryan and Blagojevich: The heat came down on Kerner because one of his payees put her bribe down as a business expense. She was under the (only slightly) mistaken notion that bribes are a necessary part of doing business in Illinois. Governor Dan Walker was not convicted of doing wrong while in office in the 70’s - but spent time in prison for his role in S&L fraud in the greedy 80’s. Ironically, he was known as a reformer, but served only one term as the last Illinois Democrat gov until the next “reformer”, Blagojevich. George Ryan, who helped to end a Republican dynasty in Illinois that lasted about a quarter century, was in the Licenses for Bribes Scandal, which meant that he was responsible, by many citizens’ account, for the death of several children in a blazing family van. That was the direct result of the carelessness of someone who got their CDL license through paying bribes to Ryan’s Secretary of State office when he was in charge there. Ryan’s great noble act while governor was to commute the death penalty for all Illinois prisoners on death row. Although it is a far-fetch from reality, some saw this as a CYOA tactic seeing how many people were calling for his own arse to be put on the chair for manslaughter.
4. This took longer than I anticipated. I must be on hibernation mode, I keep falling asleep. And, I look like a hairless bear.

Despite the protests, Ron Huberman — who just two years ago was pegged as Daley’s appointed man on the Chicago Transit Authority and is now taking over the CEO spot in the Chicago Public Schools — won’t be changing much. That’s largely because the same man will still be in charge, Mayor Daley. Even the Chicago Teacher’s Union (CTU) knows that nothing good comes of fighting Daley’s will - or at least it seems that way. CTU President Marilyn Stewart pretty much laid down the guns, saying she would prefer somebody with some actual education experience, but that she, for one, welcomes her new handsome overlord. (Is that two Simpsons quotes in two days?)

 *”Superman” by aka Kath via Flickr

 But let’s look at the bright side shall we. There’s a lot of experience that Huberman can bring to our neighborhood schools, and wherever my daughter ends up going, I’m sure it will be brighter and better because of what he can bring in. Take, for example:

• Introducing a new threat in high school men’s basketball and football, a new league will be formed out of the old standard-bearer Red West and will be rechristened, The Pink Line.
• For streamlining and updating purpses, during off-peak hours, four core classes will be shut down to one. During peak hours, two classes. Classes will resume better than before in 2014.
• Leave home early; go home late, alternate!
• After modifications are done on the north west side school (presently causing any classwork to come to a near-grinding halt), students will be able to cruise along at speeds of up to 60 miles per hour.
• Expect integral schools not serving white kids to be shut down.

Got any more ideas? Put ‘em in the comments box and we’ll be sure to post them on the internets!

A couple weeks ago, a bunch of friends from our church came with my wife, baby and I on a retreat to a tasty local restaurant (stop me if I already told this story). Since it was so danged cold, I decided that I should bring along my rarely-seen scarf (rarely seen because it matches absolutely nothing in my wardrobe. Or at least that’s what I think. We were there for a while when some other friends from our church - who were working with homeless people that frigid night - showed up. Started chatting it up with those from that group that we knew. I noticed and proclaimed that one of the guys, who is himself homeless, was blatantly wearing the very same red & blue flannel Target scarf that I was. Rather than just stand there and both look awkward at this genial faux-pas, we both pulled out our fencing swords and began to duel for the right to wear the crest.

(Okay, so I just made up that last sentence, but you get the picture.)

**

I just found out this morning that there is another website called Chicago Dads . And, from what I could tell, it looks great. Informative, up-to-date, with several pages for forums, play-dates for the children, play-dates for the parents (I’m assuming that there’s nothing fishy there. Actually, it’s called something like “Fathers Night Out”. But even that sounds a bit fishy…), etc.

It’s a part of a larger nation-wide collective called AtHomeDad, which is a multi-page site about and for stay-at-home dads .

I’m going to register at the site and I’ll let you know what I find, eh?

*For more on the Awkward Turtle, read here.

** “Paul, My Turtle, says to make each day in 2008 a great one” by turtlemom4bacon on Flickr.

In case you missed it, the dear, embattled governor of our beleagured and cash-strapped state isn’t going anywhere without a fight (and this is just a taste from the man who believes that his impeachment is a scheme to raise Illinoisian taxes). Which means that we’ll have to drag his gubernatorial arse and Cousin It-like hairpiece out of his director’s chair (which, oddly enough, is based in Chicago and not in Springfield). But a local radio station is giving Blagojevich an offer he can’t possibly refuse. If he will step down voluntarily from office now, WLS-AM will give him a two hour weekly radio show to blow his little ol’ horn about whatever the heck he wants. I’m sure that Roddy will do triumphantly in whatever format he chooses, but these are my suggestions for optimal priming and to help him make up his mind (add yours in the comments section and they will be added to the wonderful pot):

The Epic Heroes Radio Show:  Where RB reads from the classics of epic heroes, their myths, exploits, and shining examples and then reveals at the end of the show that, yes, he is Frodo/Odysseus/Herakles/King Arthur/Batman/Jesus.

Kranky Effing Yankee: All crank calls to the White House consisting entirely of bleeped-out verbal firebombs.

Keats, Longfellow, Wordsworth & Me: Two uninterrupted hours (except to introduce the pipe and/or tweed-jacket sponsor of the moment) of reading the greats. At the end, we will be assured that the hero of the poem is Blagojevich.

Hot-Rod the Shock Jock: “HaHa! Boobs! Fart! Poo! OOHH, that was a stinker.” (Let Rodderick loose on the mics with a sound-effect machine. Now, imagine the hilarity!)

Family Feud - Chicago-Style:  Do you have a powerful politically or financially connected family? Would you like to see that family bicker until it self-implodes and somebody ends up in jail? Bring them on to this show and let Blaggo work his magic!

Ideas for other shows? Leave them in the comments.

Some commentators, friends, and associates made note yesterday that during the swearing-in of President Barack Obama (ooh, goosebumps! sorry… but really that’s what this is post is about. The goosebumps, that is, not idolization of our new president), the president-of-transition goofed. I didn’t notice it because I could not concentrated beyond the din of my eyes and mouth trying their hardest to not sound like blubbering idiots.

But what really happened there, or so I believe, is that I experienced elevation . And not, ironically, of the U2/Bono variety. Or, maybe…

“Who’s That Guy?” by Elycefeliz via Flickr

Perhaps you felt it too. Roger Ebert wrote a post on it recently (before the inauguration) and he mentioned election night and how Oprah was so elated that (paraphrasing) she used the man in front of her as a giant Kleenex. Now, never mind questions of class and status (from what I understand, Oprah uses and dispenses common people like me and you as replaceable household objects every day of the week), what she felt - according to researchers and psychologists fronted by University of California-Berkeley professor of psychology Dacher Keltner and University of Virginia professor of moral psychology Jonathan Haidt - was common that day among millions and millions of Americans watching Obama’s acceptance speech from Chicago, and then watching his inauguration from DC.

Haidt calls it “elevation”. Which is really a spiritual or relgious term. Only now, however, is it being taken seriously by psychologists, who have just given it a realm within its own emotional state (new motto: “Emotional States: Not just for the negatives anymore”). There is not much new here except for the fact that it is being studied as a science, but even so, I believe that it brings to bear three things that are particularly relevant to parents and that we should bare in mind:

1) Elevation has a washing effect. It helps to clear out the negativity and cynicism which we drag around with us. I know that being a parent (really being anybody, but specifically being a parent) can be taxing and trying from the extra responsibilities. And sometimes we bring in that load to bear on our family. Going through an occasional emotional wash helps to restore a sense of balance, a sense that everything’s gonna be okay after all!

2) Although in the heat of elevation, one feels that heaven and earth will move as a result of the transcendence of the moment, apparently the effects are short-term and not very long-lasting. Which means that (um, duh?) we shouldn’t rely on feelings alone to produce active conviction. If we are to make change in the world around us for the betterment of our children’s lives, we must convince with more than just the heart or even by pulling heart-strings. We must attack from a pragmatic, tactile, mental and emotional state - an emotional message of uplift alone won’t do it.

3) You cannot control elevation. That’s like trying to make yourself happy all the time or, more apt parallel, pumping up the economy. To do a Yogiphorism: It’s not real if it’s fake. Sure, I could make myself cry every night if I watched “Extreme Home Makeover” religiously, but that becomes shallow, and the elevation is not true anymore. Once it ceases to be true, it is worthless. However, although we cannot control going into a state of elevation, we can prepare for it, mostly by looking at the world through the wonder that our children view it by. My daughter, for instance, is only eighteen months old, so she constantly looks at the world through sheer amazement, often announcing to her environment that she finds it to be worthy of a “Wooh!” or a “Wow!” What kind of eyes and ears should we gather about us when we are around them to enjoy what they enjoy? How can the world be a better place as we become more receptive to what it has to offer us and more attentive to the beauties, miracles (and dangers) that lie on every branch and around every corner?

Having said all that (informational source ), now it’s time to rawk to transcendence.

(Caveat lector: if you can use the latrine before you walk a mile in the Chicago snow and stop over at the store on the way home, maybe you should exercise that option.)

Second in a multi-part series:

I think I figured what our [men’s] problem is: We men haven’t had adequate practice in child-rearing.

Girls baby-sit while boys never consider changing a diaper, let alone watching a child for more than a few minutes at a time. I have had many male friends who have made a living watching entire houses – virtual castles for that matter – for weeks and months on end. They will watch and feed and groom pets. Heck, they will style the mess out of your hair or design the most intricate home interiors. But babies? They would rather give a pedicure to a poodle and wear a mesh top. A man who watches children? Not even remotely considered! The only men who enjoy being around babies are pedophiles. No sane male watches a baby unless they are the father or older brother (and the older sisters are indisposed. And by “indisposed” I mean, “dead” or “non-existent”. There is no other excuse for their negligence!).

Or so that’s the popular perception, spoken or - most-likely - not. It’s the silent rule and it’s silently killing fatherhood.