chicagodads

That’s how I recalled standing in for an in-school suspension room when I substitute taught at a school on the North Side of Chicago. A school not far from where my wife lived for a few years before she left the country. A school near where a teenager was fatally shot the other day - the 26th Chicago Public School student shot in this school year.

That’s as many students as were shot all of last school year, when citywide violence against young people was all the newspapers could talk about. The Chicago Sun-Times reports, “At this time in 2008, 19 students had been killed. In 2007, 18 were dead by March 11… The Sun-Times reported this week that 508 students had been shot from Sept. 2007 through Dec. 2008.”

This right after a student in a West Side school stabs his bully with a pair of scissors during a conflict resolution meeting.

I must admit I was wrong. The school didn’t measure up to what I’d seen as being a “bad” school. The neighborhood, compared to Humboldt Park or much of Logan Square, didn’t seem to be in dire need of a social overhaul or a bunch of Hugs for Troubled Thugs-type programs. But everybody hurts, and violence can happen anywhere: small towns in Alabama or a high school in Germany.

This is a systemic problem. It needs systemic solutions. Not just a hero, tons of them. Neighborhoods full of fathers and mothers and churches and mosques and synagogues and non-profits and teachers and administrators and counselors and cafeteria workers and accountants and line cooks and law clerks and construction workers and carpenters and butchers and candlestick makers and community activists and police all joining up to be good neighbors. We all need to be heroes. We owe it to this next generation to not abandon them in their hour of need.

There is going to be a public meeting with Alderman Rey Colon at Funston Elementary School this Wednesday to discuss the future of a group of affordable apartments for rent around West Armitage Avenue. The Zapata Apartments are to be four multi-apartment buildings (totaling 75 rental units in all) on presently vacant lots with three properties between the blocks of 3200 West - 3500 West Armitage and the fourth (still under negotiation) at the block of 3700 Cortland.

The Logan Square Neighborhood Association and Bickerdike Redevelopment Corporation have teamed up together and are working with the city to create this feasible project to keep families in the neighborhoods at a reasonable and sustainable rate for all.

Now, here’s the beauty of it: the economics. The LSNA and BRC expect to creat 87 jobs and generate $6,500,000 in income and $2,500,000 in tax revenue.. Now, of course, that’s just in the building of the homes (which, unlike a lot of other new buildings around these parts, can actually be filled.) Furthermore, these spaces would be rented out to working families making between $20,000 to 44,000 a year, so there are many other, sustainable economic benefits in raising these buildings (not to mention some environmental, etc.) that I’d like to hit on tomorrow through Wednesday.

The meeting is at 6pm at Funston Elementary School, 2010 N. Central Park.  See you there!

I love being so hands-on in raising my child. But I can’t help but notice on trips through the neighborhood, to the grocery store or Target, or the health clinic that I, being a male, am in the minority in childraising. An immense minority.

I found this article at the NYTimes (you may need to register) to be a bit fascinating. It’s about how the number dads who are at home rather than at work (and the glut that is happening now because of the economic downturn) is primed to make a cultural shift in how we view stay-at-home dads.

The consensus is that although stay-at-home fathers are now rising because of the massive lay-offs, downsizing, and ‘right-sizing’ of the economy, it really will, at best, lead the way for another generation where SAHF’s are commonly accepted. The comparison is to Rosie the Riveteer, who went to work in the shops, warehouses and steel mills during WWII only to go back to the domestic life for the next twenty years.

However, the argument goes, it was because women were seen doing the traditional “man’s” job - even if for just a brief, emergency period - that some years later, they were able to find a way back into the “man’s world.” The idea is that there will be a short but pronounced spike in daddies staying home only to return to the workforce as soon as the market is ‘corrected’ (whatever that may mean), but that a generation from now, definitions and lifestyles may change.

What do you think? So much crackpipe? Are laid-off men staying home to watch their kids or just regrouping and working on their resumes in the meantime? Should these gender roles stay fixed?

* “Rosie Redux 0” by Malenkov in Exile via Flickr.

I was raised in the city. I wish I could say that I always felt home here, but that isn’t true. I wanted to live in the ‘burbs during my teen years. I wish I could say that it was always easy living in the city, but that wouldn’t be true either. I also wish that I could tell you and certainly my daughter that I have always felt safe here, but I’d be lying through my locks.

My brothers and I grew up and habituated in some dangerous neighborhoods (understood of in terms of plenty of poverty, gangs, drug-dealing, homelessness, etc.), but I’ve been fortunate enough to not really have to face much personal violence. Been the victim of a string of burglaries during my teens, never really had to deal with gangs (perhaps it was the whole geekery and/or the church-boy thingy, but they just left me alone), got mugged once (considering the places I’ve been and the hours I’ve been down them, it seems to me that the odds are better getting struck by lightning), a couple attempted and bungled pick-pockets (though I did become the victim of poaching once, it wasn’t in Chicago).

All to say, I turned out all right. But, I understand that not everybody feels as nonchalant about being near such circumstances, especially when it’s your kids on the line.

But I also know a little about the— shall we call it, seedy underbelly of growing up in gated communities. The drugs might be sold, for example, in the inner city, but that isn’t necessarily their end destination. Then there’s the suicide rate, and this general (but perhaps unquantifiable) feeling of angst, meaninglessness, and boredom that young ones feel - which is why so many of them move to the Big City at first chance, only to return to the ‘burbs (or extend the suburbs into exurbia) once they have children.

Which finally brings us to our point (I so don’t like to beat around the bush…): one of the primary decisions on where a child attends school literally centers on the location of the household. Many of those who can afford to relocate so that their children can attend the best schools do so. Even those that I know that could not afford to pack up and move packed up and sent their child to a relative who lived in a preferable district or neighborhood.

“Let’s Go To Work Boys” by Senor Codo via Flickr.

The reasons for moving are myriad: the cost of raising a family in the city is prohibitive for some (as I imagine it would be in New York, or if one was looking to own in Chicago, especially in a nicer neighborhood); others have carefully gauged all factors (I know a father that got out a very intricate spreadsheet and mathematically mapped it all out); some are worried about their children not fitting in a particular location (where there are few others like them, or too many like them); perceived or real notions of superiority of education based on empirical, intangible or imagined factors (I have some friends that I love dearly leave the city under the notion that any public school in any suburban zone is preferable to any public school in Chicago. I tried to convince them of the foolishness of that decision, and that was before I became a teacher/advocate. I am even more convinced now that they were wrong); cultural issues (for us, this is a paramount reason to stay in the city. We want our daughter to be able to understand that the world is filled with people who do not necessarily look or act like us, and that that is both a good thing to know and a good tool to have); and, finally, to be honest, safety issues.

But I’d like to know what you think: Have you chosen a route, did you regret it, will you choose, have you given it much thought, etc, etc.?

Did anybody else catch Hugh Jackman talking to Bahbawa Waltehz before the show about adoption (specifically, he and his wife adopted two mixed-race children, he says, because they were told few possible adopters wanted them. I wasn’t able to catch everything he said thereabouts, and I can’t find clips of that part. Anybody else catch it)? It warmed my heart to hear him (and, yes, other big-name celebrities) talk so openly about adopting. This, I believe, is a big step up from my parents’ generation, when adopting was looked down upon as being less-than “real” parenting, at least in mainstream society. It seems that the stigma is still there (I really can’t imagine why else fertility drugs and in vitro, etc., are so popular), so I applaud the Angelina Jolie’s, et.al., for taking a public stand for adoption when so many children are (to be quite frank if not PC) in need of parents.

What do you think of celebrities and this new fashion (so to say) of adoption? Is it mostly just another guilty-trip cause, an accessory, a noble idea that should catch on?

1) New Wave Cafe. It’s big for a brand new coffeeshop, first off. My wife and I were comparing it to two other coffee institutions (well, at least in this ChicagoDad’s world) Letizia’s Natural Bakery and Cafe (one of the first in Ukranian Village and my normal home away from home when I lived, worked and worshiped there) and Starbucks (previous to this opening, one of the only spots open for coffee - if you include Dunkin’ Donuts - in Logan Square). When I say that it’s big , I mean compared to, say Letizia’s which literally started as a take-out spot and then gradually upped itself until it used two spaces plus the outdoor cafe (in the spring to late fall) to accomodate its patrons there for the deelish natural baked yummies (fresh muffins were to die for! and totally worth the 2 bucks). Later, it morphed into a wine eatery, but, oh well. They still served Intelligentsia Coffee (some of our finest roast here in Chicago) and wonderful paninis, pizza blocks and cranberry cookies. But I think the difference in this regard is that Logan Square has long been ready for a cafe to act as a sort of cultural center. Add the new wave (read: 80s) kitsch , the not-too-loud music, the nice staff, the fine Metropolis roast (so much of a relief after Starbuck’s bitter roast. I’ve had two cups so far of their coffee and not once had the urge to spit it out), and the fact that there’s plenty of open space to chit-chat or work/study, I think this may be my new spot. Did I mention I had a blondie with bacon in it? WOW! Nice, huh? [Edit: So, apparently, some friends and readers informed me that 1) bacon is interspersed in various baked goods at New Wave and the menu changes constantly and 2) bacon in baked goods is become quite the vogue fashion - and therefore unfashionable - throughout Culinary World.]

The downside is that although it’s fairly close, it’s not that close.  It’s about a mile away, though if I need to, the bus and train are both kiddy-corner and a direct stop in front of my place.

2) The other spot we’ve been to recently (for a kind of neighborhood association mixer) is a nueva Mexicana BYOB called La Estrella Negra . As you can probably tell from its name (the Black Star ), it’s got kind of a quirky, dark theme - actually a Dia de la Muerte theme all over the place. The decor (including paintings displayed prominently not just on the walls but also the tabletops) is whimsically self-decorated by the multi-talented owner (who also plays in a band that sometimes performs there, apparently) and friends.

I thought the food was a bit pricey and the service a bit slow, but the La 25 tacos de pollo we ended up leaving with (we could only stay shortly as it was cutting into the baby’s sleep time) were quite delicious and featured - of course - bacon strips. Not sure that paying 10 bucks for three tacos is desirable (especially if you wait almost an hour for them), but I think the place has some promise as an ocassional spot. Especially if they find intriguing things to do with bacon.

So, apparently, I may have spoken too soon. It seems that Rolan Burris did talk to Blagojevich (or, in this case, his proxy, also named Blagojevich, Rob Blagojevich. Try saying that Happy-Potted-Hippopotamus line eight times fast.) about financial aid before accepting the Senate appointment . Talks of Burris doing fund-raising for the then-governor broke down because of gathering heat, apparently. And now the Illinois legislature seems to actually be in a silent tizzy about this all.

And I could see why they’d want to keep their mouths shut. It is embarrassing to the entire state and it could lead to further investigations, as long as the spotlight’s on Illinois (and not just Chicago this time). Let’s hope that this cheap sweater gets unraveled.

The great meltdown is slightly fascinating, if that makes any sense. I got to observe it first hand while trying to navigate Joss’s stroller down Milwaukee Ave (and in front of quite a few vacant lots, but more on that later). The streets, certainly the main streets have already been plowed through, have abundant problems there - meteorite-sized cracked concrete and asphalt holes as a result of the heavy snow and even heavier plowing. But we were mostly staying on the sidewalks. And not that everything is faulty, (for instance, we had a lot of snow build-up and most days were well below freezing, so there is bound to be plenty of running and even still water), but some thoughts did occur to me during our jaunt.

1. It’s dirty out there. A lot of it unintentional pollution, dirt from tires and exhaust trapped in the snow. Maybe there is little to be done about that. But there was also a lot of litter, cig butts, bottles, wrappers, a bunch of crude, nasty stuff everywhere. People, please, who cleans up your crap? Nobody! Your mamas don’t live outside. I would add that down my stretch of Milwaukee (Particularly from Western/Armitage to California), we are lacking in public waste cans (which are normally provided for by the local Chamber of Commerce or other concerned local businesses), but even still. I can’t recall the amount of times I’ve seen people litter within feet, inches even, of a perfectly usable trashcan. At the very least, have some pride in your city and yourself. Even more so, think of the misquitos attracted to the still water caused by drain blockage.
2. Speaking of local businesses…  A lot of the property is being run-down. For whatever reason that is/may be (and I know that not all of it is tied to the current problems with the economy, but rather a wanting to see things redeveloped in a different fashion), people still own the property. People who own the property, even when they are making no money currently off of the property are still in charge of taking care of the property and its surroundings. Which means, shovel the sidewalks! Many of us are aware of the ridiculous laws in Chicago concerning sidewalk care*, but you still have a civic duty to take care of your own image and prospective clients, don’t you? Not to mention the community for which you are a part of, even if just tangentially? There were about three times during our trip that we had to share the street with cars and other pedestrians because we couldn’t navigate on the sidewalk - there was too much ice left over. And, that goes for you too, Logan Boulevard property owners. If your house or property is worth several hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of dollars, then why can’t you pay some kid or homeless person $5-10 once a week or so to shovel out your walkway? Consider it your own economic stimulus package. Thank you for your patriotism.
3. Enjoy the day. It’s a lovely day of grace.

* Apparently, if someone falls in front of your property as a result of inclement weather (ice, say) and you did some work on it since the last snowfall (shovel and/or salt), then you are liable. If they fall and you personally left it untouched, you are not liable. I know: Stupid, stupid, stupid!

But it was sufficiently warm for a muffin trip and an outing to the library.

The ladies at the Dunkin Donuts were so smitten with her that they offered her a couple munchkins. Such is the hard life of a little princess…

Pic courtesy Shoddy Camphone.

Have you ever had a moment when, despite everything within you teaching you to be a more peaceful person, you just wanted to punch somebody square in the jaw for an insolent remark they made. About a year ago, I found myself so enraged with then-President Bush when he struck down a bill that would extend federal aid for poor families to put their children on healthcare insurance through the states. There are reasons, I’m sure, why he and others could justify such an action, but the reason he (and certain members of Congress even today) gave was so callous, I believe that if I were in the press conference room on that particular day, I would’ve thrown a shoe at him. He stated that healthcare “should be given to the most needy first”.  I cannot verify (because I’m not a verificator) but I believe those were his words.

Fortunately, last night, those words meant nothing as President Obama signed the bill extending healthcare insurance for children into a law .

This is not justification for not giving it to others who are also needy as well. It is an age-old tactic of pitting the poor against the very poor. Why? The issue is whether or not poor children in a land of plenty can receive adequate healthcare (by way of interest to readers of this blog, Illinois has its AllKids program , meaning that every child is already covered, or at least was under the state. And I applaud Illinois for having the guts to have this system up in place. Otherwise, we would be in insurmountable debt at this moment).

Having been a teacher, I understand what it is like to teach kids who do not have their basic needs being met. Some kids only come for the meal. Others do not come at the beginning of the year because they have not been able to secure a physical and their shots (until someone from the school calls them and suggests a clinic or the school nurse). Also, the gaps are too large between being on medicare and being able to actually afford medical coverage if your work doesn’t cover it. And since so many families survive from check-to-check, because so many single mothers (or single fathers) have to work shoddy hours, because so many have sickly children and are not able to hold down steady jobs or were not able to finish school because they have had to care for their child regularly, there is a wide berth of citizens who cannot afford to drop what little pay they get just to end up on Medicaid. Nobody should be paying a thousand dollars a month or not getting early treatment for their child because some well-compensated jerk in DC is worried about looking like a commie or because he or she is being paid off by Big Med.

As well, it’s a national and economic issue. If families cannot afford to get early treatment, they will wait until it is too late to adequately reverse the ailment. The end result will cost exponentially more, which they will not be able to pay and which will thence be dumped into the system — which means that the rest of us will end up chewing that bill anyway. Let’s take care of them before we lose productivity, proper and foundational schooling and education, lives and - hell, if Republicans don’t care about anything else - tax dollars.

Finally, in regards to the weak arguments against this bill put out by certain members of Congress, I can only say that I have no tolerance for those who make money hand-over-fist and sit in the comfy seat and judge others for not being as privileged as them and their children. I do not have much tolerance for those who do not try to understand how hard it is for many in this country to get by. Have they no shame?

Rod went out with a whimper, from what I heard. It was a loud, blustery, meandering whimper, from what I heard. But he went out, and in the end, that’s what matters. Or is it?

1. Legendary Chicago Sun-Times columnist Mary Mitchell came on the Rachel Maddow show on Friday to speak briefly of the impeachment and offered something revealing before almost (and oddly) redacting her statement. She compared state lawmakers to a group of thugs hanging out in the corner, trying to do their game. They don’t face any real trouble until one of their kind brings in “the heat”. When that happens, they have to shut down that person in order to reduce the heat.
2. The new guy, Pat Quinn, once was referred to as “Celozzi & Ettleson all rolled into one.” That’s cool, because I could always save more money. He also, at least used to, have a very different take on education funding than anybody else near his office from what I’ve heard. But I doubt that the legislature will get behind some whack-a-mamy scheme to double the Illinois state tax (to 6%, I believe) for the wealthiest in an effort to reduce the need for suckling on the teats of property taxes according to region (which means the poorer regions always lose out). I mean, not when there’s at least one other state that has a better record than Illinois at funding our schools.
3. An interesting and possibly apocryphal story about former Illinois Governor Otto Kerner, the first of the (il)legal dynasty ending with Ryan and Blagojevich: The heat came down on Kerner because one of his payees put her bribe down as a business expense. She was under the (only slightly) mistaken notion that bribes are a necessary part of doing business in Illinois. Governor Dan Walker was not convicted of doing wrong while in office in the 70’s - but spent time in prison for his role in S&L fraud in the greedy 80’s. Ironically, he was known as a reformer, but served only one term as the last Illinois Democrat gov until the next “reformer”, Blagojevich. George Ryan, who helped to end a Republican dynasty in Illinois that lasted about a quarter century, was in the Licenses for Bribes Scandal, which meant that he was responsible, by many citizens’ account, for the death of several children in a blazing family van. That was the direct result of the carelessness of someone who got their CDL license through paying bribes to Ryan’s Secretary of State office when he was in charge there. Ryan’s great noble act while governor was to commute the death penalty for all Illinois prisoners on death row. Although it is a far-fetch from reality, some saw this as a CYOA tactic seeing how many people were calling for his own arse to be put on the chair for manslaughter.
4. This took longer than I anticipated. I must be on hibernation mode, I keep falling asleep. And, I look like a hairless bear.

Despite the protests, Ron Huberman — who just two years ago was pegged as Daley’s appointed man on the Chicago Transit Authority and is now taking over the CEO spot in the Chicago Public Schools — won’t be changing much. That’s largely because the same man will still be in charge, Mayor Daley. Even the Chicago Teacher’s Union (CTU) knows that nothing good comes of fighting Daley’s will - or at least it seems that way. CTU President Marilyn Stewart pretty much laid down the guns, saying she would prefer somebody with some actual education experience, but that she, for one, welcomes her new handsome overlord. (Is that two Simpsons quotes in two days?)

 *”Superman” by aka Kath via Flickr

 But let’s look at the bright side shall we. There’s a lot of experience that Huberman can bring to our neighborhood schools, and wherever my daughter ends up going, I’m sure it will be brighter and better because of what he can bring in. Take, for example:

• Introducing a new threat in high school men’s basketball and football, a new league will be formed out of the old standard-bearer Red West and will be rechristened, The Pink Line.
• For streamlining and updating purpses, during off-peak hours, four core classes will be shut down to one. During peak hours, two classes. Classes will resume better than before in 2014.
• Leave home early; go home late, alternate!
• After modifications are done on the north west side school (presently causing any classwork to come to a near-grinding halt), students will be able to cruise along at speeds of up to 60 miles per hour.
• Expect integral schools not serving white kids to be shut down.

Got any more ideas? Put ‘em in the comments box and we’ll be sure to post them on the internets!

A friend asked, in regards to an article she was to do for Relevant Magazine , “If you could pick one thing, what do you hope the Obama administration does for the moral good of the country? “

Unfortunately I was too late to meet the deadline. However, Relevant’s loss is ChicagoDad’s gain:

My hope is that the Obama administration would communicate to the American people how the growing disparity in education between those who have and those who do not is undemocratic and dangerous for the American economy. My hope is that President Obama can demonstrate that until we see that we are replacing broken schools with overcrowded prisons because we are not treating all of our children fairly, we all lose out. That until we retain the dignity of the Supreme Court’s Brown v. Board of Ed decision in deed as well as word, we all lose out. That until brown, black, rural and poor children can get the same early start on education and come to kindergarten prepared to learn in a stable and welcoming environment as more privileged children, we all lose out.

*Atelier Teee, “Abandoned School” via Flickr .

Because our economy is not the same now as it was fifty years ago, when large segments of the population could go into service or manufacturing with little prior experience or learning and still create jobs and money, we need to creatively address our problems with a fully-educated and prepared workforce. Because our economy will not be the same in twenty years, we cannot afford to address the widening education gap between the haves and the have-nots now, before our democracy becomes a true oligarchy.

These are my hopes for the moral good of the country. My prayer is that President-elect Obama and his team will consider the long-term needs of this country and of our citizens.

Please read the other (and thankfully shorter, less flatulent and less convoluted) responses here .

I would love to hear your responses, though, in the comments section.

The first time we went out together with her (for something other than a doctor’s appointment, I believe) was during our anniversary - about two weeks after Jocelyn was born. We decided to go to the local theaters for an innocuous and relatively quiet kiddie movie and then head over to a Chicago institution, a local chocolate and ice cream parlor named Margie’s Candies . We waited outside the shoppe for several minutes and then finally got seated in a tight corner (well, the whole place is one tight corner after another - it’s a full circle of tight corners. And deliciousness).

We got our dinners, which mostly consisted of wonderful old fashioned ice cream overlayed with melted, rich, dark chocolate, and were chowing away when we realized that the daughter had plans of her own, which eventually left her very uncomfortable. We had to do some immediate clean up, but there wasn’t room to manuever and the place had no open bathroom, certainly not one large enough for what we were in need of. Fortunately, we live within walking distance and were able to rush home, but it was a long five minutes.

Taking little ones out in public can be, at the least, a hassle. You always have to plan for everything and then some. Some places may have adequate stalls and cooperative and helpful staff. Some places may be baby and kid friendly, others only sporadically so. We tend to patronage the places that have those amenities, but sometimes you’re stuck. And sometimes, it’s just best not to go and bring the party home.

Outdoor festivals, however, are a bit of a tricky widget, I suppose. This last summer, we took Jocelyn to the Puerto Rican Festival. We made sure to take lots of pictures, get her in lots of rides, take her to hear music, see her play with dogs (poor dogs)… She had lots of fun. But we could change her on the grass. We were able to bring food and even buy some there. We brought her to a nearby Puerto Rican restaurant (Borinquen - also highly recommended. Especially for their wonderfully garlicky, crunchy, and chewy jibaritos) afterward and she ate the bread (it was really cute. Had to stick my fingers in her mouth to rescue her from her own squirrelly-ness).

But we were able to get in and out easily enough, it wasn’t overcrowded, and it was near home. Not so much with the inauguration, it seems. An advisory for the upcoming presidential inauguration - according to the NYTimes - is telling parents that they should not bring their young children to this mid-winter and overcrowded event. To hear some people tell it, that should be the case with all public outdoor gatherings (partly, my immediate suspicion is, because they’re fascists. But also, we parents do have a way of not knowing where we’re going with our massive strollers sometimes [and heck, we need ours to survive the Chicago winters and sidewalk terrain. So I’m not going to apologize for having one]). Others think that it’s more curtailing of rights of individuals to bring their babies into highly hazardous areas where a bomb or a sniper may arise.

Umm… anybody up for deliberate moderation on this?

Part 1 is here .

Part 6 is here .

Today’s caveat lector:  The other four parts are scattered somewhere between those two.

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Our heroes in this movie [the never-produced sequel to Jingle All the Way, Jingle All the Way 2: Again!] would be wise enough to delicately hold on to their toys until the end of Christmas break, understanding that a status symbol is only as cool as those who understand its place. So they bring it to show-and-tell on the first day of school. Therefore, they have found a use more satisfying than mere transitory happiness. Its intended use has extended to social-standing, to place our heroines at the head of the social pack and pecking order (to mix animal metaphors) and that would possibly last him, her or them for about ten minutes at school before their next swirlie. At which case, it would be “Back to the dregs for you, Mister.” In which case the fathers would look on and knowingly and wisely nod their heads in approval. We understand that falling victim to bullying is a rite of passage. A completely unnecessary, barbaric, psychologically damaging rite of passage, but if we had to go through it, they should too.

If, however, this movie was produced by Michael Bay, we can at least expect our heroines to go down with a few nifty explosions.

Via my blogging friend Micah comes this tale of an underdog father and mother suing the big grocery chain because they believe that their oldest child has been discriminated against on the eve of his third birthday. It is a sad story being in that the child is just a victim of his parents utter mental retardation and society’s reluctance to remove he and his kin from his dumb-dumb destructive parents.

I do not say this lightly. I am not in favor of normalizing families. I know of Christians who are raising their children in hostile environs across the globe and Muslims who are trying to do the same here. But most seem to be aware of what the sacrifices are and seem to be willing to minimize the cost on their children. The brunt of their decisions lay on them, not their offspring and certainly not immediately. But New Jersey couple Heath and Deborah Campbell don’t seem to be aware that giving such names as Adolph Hitler and JoyceLynn Aryan Nation to their children would have massive social and emotional tolls on their kids.

Having said all that, though, I do not think it would be in the best interests of society for the government to intervene and take the children away at this stage - maybe for their dangerous actions, but not specifically for their views. That may set an ugly precedent in this country that I think few but the most ardent fascists would want to see. However, it does rest on the local communities to act out in bold and loving ways to reach-out to this family. This may seem counter-intuitive, but nothing beats exclusitivity like inclusion. What better way to teach these children to love all people regardless of race than to have people of all races love these children?

Those words I heard as I was hauling myself and my seventeen month old daughter off the bus. We were on our way to a birthday party for a one year old boy named Samuel and a man had entered the bus and struck up a conversation with us. Of course, this being Chicago on a Saturday leading up to Christmas, a lot of people got on and off the bus during our three-mile tour. But the little observant lady found no one willing to make eye contact with her or address her on the bus until late in the journey when this man did. By then, we were getting close to our destination and the bus was getting closer to its final destination.

I appreciate public transportation for a lot of reasons. Obviously, a large segment of the population (us included) can’t afford to have/keep a car, congestion of a massive group of people trying to get to a few spaces in a very time-specific manner in separate vehicles would destroy our infrastructure and cause everyone to be late, wastes preportionately less gas, etc., etc. But it also forces us to face the cold, hard reality of a shared space. That shared space rarely turns into something that I (nor any sane person) would call community, but at least we become aware that we are not alone nor left to our own devices (well, except for that jerk on Western Ave who thought that somehow me sitting down on the bench next to him on a CROWDED bus would give him a right to voice his Euro-trash homophobia as if I somehow offended him). So, every once in a while, it’s good for a hardened Chicagoan like myself to run into another Chicagoan who is cool with just striking up a convo about kids on the bus. Every once in a while, it’s nice to lower the old guard down.

And, I must admit, there was a bit of pride in me when we walked out into the December rain and I realized that it was another man - who had entered the bus within the last two minutes and sat next to Joss, who she had also looked up to as if to strike her own muted conversation - that said something to the first guy about me and my daughter. I could practically feel him point with a bit of pride himself at the odd sight of a full-grown man holding preciously to his pint-sized princess. “That’s something you don’t see every day.” Being here all my life, seeing so many fathers abandon their children, knowing so many of the children who were abandoned, I knew exactly what he was talking about. And I felt extra good about my special relationship with my special baby.

It wasn’t until now that I realized that these brief encounters in these shared spaces could also be described so succinctly and warmly.

Update and clarification.

My personality does not allow me to tolerate fighting. Not to say I do not become enraged or even bitter. But I’m not much of a fighter. So, to see my lovely wife take on the powers that be largely out of guts, determination, skill (which she has in spades, my friends), and a passion for the marginalized/displaced meant that I had to be involved too. Not that I regret it, it’s just that I tend to be a little more calculating (which is my way of saying, “I’ll make snide remarks from the sidelines rather than actually investing in or risking anything, thank you very much!”). All of that to say, I’ve got a headache today, and I never once pounded the pavement or met with the alderman or rounded up signatures or spoke to anyone in Spanish about this proposal.

But enough about me.

I’m proud of my wife for the reasons above. But I’m also proud of her for going to the alderman’s office twice to ask him to delay sending it through City Hall until necessary, reasonable, and safe modifications can be made. Today my wife and her partner-in-crime made their argument that most residents in the target area (according to the study itself) have only a high school education (if that) and a large segment rely on some form of public assistance, but none of the “community representatives” who helped to fashion the plan were in those demographics; they argued that businesses that are already in the study area were not considered because they did not fit a certain social idea (for example, there is a very popular Cuban coffee shop across the alley from us, but neither it nor the two Dunkin’ Donuts nearby were considered as coffee houses; there’s a Currency Exchange that is considered a financial institution to many in the community, but not to the authors of the plan; and so on); they argued that the plan should be translated into Spanish and even offered to help with that; and they suggested that there should be safeguards set in place not to alter the entire plan, but to protect those already in the community from massive and unfair jettisoning (I’m guessing that that is a word, since my spell-check didn’t even underline it).

Did it work? We’re not sure yet. But we can rest knowing that the presentation was laid out clearly. We should receive an answer by tomorrow (Wednesday). In the meantime, continue to pray and do send out an occasional call (773-278-0101) or email (ward01@cityofchicago.org) if you can and ask for these safeguards for the Milwaukee Corridor. We need to keep storefront and living spaces affordable enough for the average person who currently runs a business or resides here as well.

I should also mention that we are, for the most part, in need of many of the changes that the Milwaukee Corridor plan would provide. But we are always weary around (1) greedy developers and (2) people who talk about considering the poor and minorities but neither listen to nor involve them into the process.

My wife and a couple community activists went to try to talk the alderman down from his plans. I have a feeling that we are not considered his vested interests. But having a couple rolls full of signatures did help to get his ear, however. Which I find odd…

If people don’t speak now, he can get away with what he wants. He can say that he was working for the best of the community and doing what the community wants (after all, as these developers are buying up huge plots of land, they are now of course members of the community…); he can say that the time was now or never, that the community was made aware through “public” displays in newspapers (which, conveniently, nobody reads anymore).

And, of course, he would have a point… But what really bothers me is how people feel intimidated to not stand up and be counted against the wishes of the powerful in this city. And anybody who knows this city (”that works”) knows what I mean. I’m not shaming the intimidated.  They have every reason to be afraid. The kind of things that our politically-connected put their opposition through when they don’t get their way is straight up out of the old movies. Surly men twirling their mustaches and tying down damsels to train tracks have nothing on these guys. The developers make an offer you can’t refuse; if you refuse, they send Three-finger Louie and My-Cousin-the-Building-Inspector-Vito over to “inspect” your property. Before you know it, you’re up to your grimy little fingertips in ridiculous and hefty fines. They strapped on the concrete shoes, are you ready to swim with the fishies?

All is not lost, however. We just elected our first non-white president, our first black president, our first community-activist president. Can I get a “Yes We Can”?

We still need support. We still need prayer. We still need phone calls to the alderman’s office (773-278-0101 or email them at ward01@cityofchicago.org). And we just may need your bodies downtown on Thursday afternoon.

What was astounding about Thanksgiving was how obvious the pro-turkey bias is. Big turkey has got its grabby claws on everybody. Even dear ol’ grams, when referring to our potted pig just out of the oven, mentioned what a good-looking bird that must be. To be fair, though, she could only see it from a distance and my wife absentmindedly agreed with her.

To say that I was making ham on Thanksgiving Day and not turkey was tantamount to admitting that Benedict Arnold was a true American patriot and that nobody should knock the idea of eating human flesh for the Holidays until they’ve at least tried it. You would have thought that I slapped George Washington’s mother in the face.

But the truth is twofold. First, I eat turkey all the time. It is our number one substitute for meat. You want a hamburger without the guilt but you want to know that it had some form of (non-turnip-related) blood? Try a turkey-burger. That’s what we do. All. The. Time. Pasta meat, homemade pizza sausage… well, that’s about it, I suppose. But if there more items that I would make on a regular basis, you could bet that turkey would be on the meat-substitute. Either that or peanut-butter.

TBC tomorrow.